My Life is in Limbo

I’m a 51-year-old woman, and I’m finding this to be a strange time in my life.

Guilt & Motivation in Midlife Health

Let’s start with my body and exercise.

On one hand, I’m still “young,” but on the other, I’m feeling more aches and pains. Is it aging? Not moving enough (even though I try—I really do!)? Perimenopause? Who knows? My body is changing, and nothing seems to work the way it used to.

I’ve exercised my entire life—sports as a kid, old-school aerobics and step classes at the YMCA in the ‘90s, and endless gym memberships throughout my 20s, 30s, and 40s. Fitness has always been a part of who I am. But now? HIIT workouts and spin classes feel impossible. Instead, I find myself drawn to gentler movement—walking, swimming, strength training, tai chi.

I know it’s all good for me, yet some days, motivation is hard to come by. More often than before, I choose a nap over a workout. Then comes the guilt: Am I lazy? A hypocrite? I tell my clients to prioritize their health and fitness in retirement, yet here I am, feeling like a sloth. (Though, to be fair, sloths are adorable.)

Quick Self-Assessment: Why Is Movement Feeling Harder?

If you’re in the same boat, ask yourself:
☐ Have I adjusted my workouts to fit my body’s needs today?
☐ Could perimenopause, joint health, or recovery time be playing a role?
☐ Am I listening to my body’s signals—or pushing against them?
☐ Would reframing movement as “self-care” instead of an obligation help?
☐ Do I need a fresh approach—maybe a new activity, a buddy, or a different schedule?

Some days, movement will come easily. Other days, rest will be the better choice. Either way, I remind myself—showing up for my body in whatever way feels right is what really matters.

Living Situation & Transition Planning

And then there’s my living situation.

My partner and I have a plan: in three years, when our kids go off to university, we’ll sell my condo, end his lease, and finally live together. We’ll move to a smaller community about an hour east of Toronto—a place with walking trails along the lake, a clubhouse with pools, a private golf course, pickleball courts, lawn bowling, and an active outdoor lifestyle. People in this community even drive around in their own golf carts!

It’s exactly the life I envision for myself, I need for myself and my health, and I can’t wait. But I have to.

Making the Most of This Waiting Period

I know I’m not the only one in a “limbo” phase—waiting for the next chapter, impatient to start fresh. But instead of just waiting, I’ve been asking myself: How can I start bringing elements of that future life into my present?

If you’re also preparing for a transition, whether it’s downsizing, relocating, or reshaping your lifestyle, this might help:
👉 Download Retire Ready Canada’s Free Guide for practical steps on planning your next chapter. Click here to access it.

Parenting a Teen While Preparing for Change

In the meantime, I remind myself to appreciate these years with my son. He’s 16, and I’m lucky he still enjoys hanging out with me. I know he’ll go off and do great things, and I don’t want to rush this time. And yet, part of me is impatient. I want to start living this next chapter now.

I recently read a tip that stuck with me:
“Instead of focusing on how little time you have left with your child at home, focus on how much time you still get to share with them.”

So I’m leaning into that.

Waiting, but Not Standing Still

I guess that’s what this all comes down to—I feel like my life is in limbo. The plans are there, the vision is clear, but for now, I wait.

But I can also make space for this moment. I can use this time to adapt, reflect, and experiment.
I can start living elements of my future life now, in small ways.

Because even in the waiting, life is still moving forward.

If this resonates with you—if you’re in a season of transition or unsure how to transition into your ideal retirement, I’m here to help.

Sign up for a free consultation to start planning your retirement lifestyle with confidence here.
Download the Free Retirement Guide for practical steps on navigating change. Click here to access it.